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LOS ANGELES vs RIO DE JANEIRO
Text: SHAWN BLORE
Illustrations: BRUCE ROBERTS
1. Soft Drink/Beer Ratio
In L.A., six Millers cost nearly twice as much as six Cokes. What’s more, step onto the sidewalk with an open beer and you might find yourself prone, cuffed and stuffed in the back of an LAPD cruiser. In Rio, icy cold cerveja is consumed right on the beach, or anywhere else you’ve got a mind. A Skol at 1.8 reais cost a mere 30 centavos more than a Guarana soft drink in upscale Ipanema.
In a perfect world, 1:1 or a score of 100; anything lower is sobering.
L.A. 48.9
Rio 93.3
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2. Carbohydrate Comparison
L.A.’s classic carb is chips and salsa. At Holy Guacamole in trendy Santa Monica, the chips were warm and crisp, with regular and extra spicy salsa. Still, it’s only a chip. In Rio, the carbs of choice are pastelzinhos (stuffed, deep-fried dough balls). Universally available from shops, kiosks and carts in several varieties, they’re utterly delicious – but subtract the Fat Factor.
A Parisian croissant is a baseline 100; other carbs must rise to the challenge.
L.A. 55
Rio 107
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3. Babe and Hunk Index
Babe and Hunk IndeX: Affluent Angelenos dress in the ragged style of Third World peasants. (Note to guys who think baggy pants and a baseball cap is fashionable: It’s not.) Cariocas are naturally stunning – thanks to the promiscuous mix of Portuguese, African and native Indian genes in their DNA – and they dress to impress. Only on L.A’s Rodeo Drive could the trendiest shoppers pass for ugly classmates of the plainest Cariocas.
Summed average of stylish head turners in a crowd of 100.
L.A. 32.7
Rio 77
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4. Street Life Indicator
All categories are represented on Rio’s streets: barbecue shrimp, pop, beer, clothes, books, CDs, musicians, street protests and beggars. In L.A., Santa Monica’s Third Street Promenade had pizza slices, carrot and bee-pollen juice, transvestites selling squash, Hawaiian shirts, junk jewelry, aging hippies with bongos, and a beggar with a cardboard sign ("Why lie? Need a beer").
Percentage of goods and attractions available on a busy street or square.
L.A. 86
Rio 100
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5. Public Order Index
Cariocas don’t jaywalk much. It’s purely Darwinian: In Rio’s traffic they wouldn’t live long enough to reproduce. As a recompense, a taxi trip from the Sugarloaf to downtown was remarkably quick (2 minutes/km). Angelenos don’t jaywalk – or walk much, either. With all those cars clogging the streets, a taxi ride between Venice Beach and Santa Monica was painfully slow (3.41 minutes/km).
Average number of jaywalkers in a crowd of 200 people (low score, low fun factor).
L.A. -2
Rio 6
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Conclusion: Though Rio and L.A. are both oceanside cities with sun, sand and reputations for laid-back hedonism, when it comes to being civilized, L.A. just isn’t in Rio’s league.
L.A. 220.6
Rio 383.3
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STANDINGS:
| Rio | 383.3 |
| Rome | 380.3 |
| Paris | 353.5 |
| Mexico | 346.1 |
| Amsterdam | 343.2 |
| Buenos Aires | 331.8 |
| Zurich | 325.8 |
| Berlin | 325.3 |
| London | 294.1 |
| Mumbai | 289.5 |
| San Francisco | 283.8 |
| Tokyo | 283.8 |
| Hong Kong | 281.5 |
| Moscow | 277.9 |
| Shanghai | 259.2 |
| New York | 255.1 |
| Toronto | 249.1 |
| Washington | 242.0 |
| Montréal | 233.9 |
| Los Angeles | 220.6 |
| Vancouver | 213.1 |
| Chicago | 197.1 |
Next Match : St. Petersburg vs. Havana – exclusively at enroutemag.com in December 2004.
Watch for a Civilization Index finale in January 2005. [ ]
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St. Petersburg vs Havana
Rome vs Buenos Aires
Washington vs Moscow
Mexico vs Tokyo
London vs Mumbai
Chicago vs Berlin
San Francisco vs Shanghai
Toronto vs Zurich
Hong Kong vs Vancouver
Montreal vs Amsterdam
New York vs Paris
Los Angeles vs Rio de Janeiro
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© 2004 enRoute is published monthly by Spafax Canada Inc. All rights reserved.
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